Bridal Gown Shopping Rules
Can I speak plainly?
Many bridal salons are not your friend. They are a business and therefore have to make a profit to stay in business. Selling you a dress that makes your special day a success is wonderful and icing on the cake, but the goal is still to sell you a dress even if it's less than you dreamed of. They don't have much reason to think you will be a repeat customer. Even with the divorce rate near 50% and the old idea of "you're only going to do this once" loosing its popularity, the chances of you returning to a bridal store as a repeat customer are slim. Most ladies who do decide to walk down the aisle a second time do not do it in the grand fashion that needs a bridal salon's services.
So, what incentive does a bridal salon have to give good service? Reputation is a biggie. If you had a great experience, you may recommend the store to a friend when they are planning a wedding. I have had the privilege of working with several excellent Bridal Salons that deserve gold stars for their efforts to make every bride that comes through their door feel special and get her the gown of her dreams. But I have been so very disturbed over the years of hearing stories from my customers of how they were treated in some salons and several experiences of my own working with and for several places that I just have to speak out, even though it often gets me in hot water with.
Most Salons will do their best to give you a wonderful experience hoping for a good review or better - - - you recommend them to a friend. It's important to remember the old adage, “The buyer beware". We, as consumers, must look after ourselves in any retail situation. And this goes doubly when you are a bride. You are usually young and rather inexperienced with formal wear as with the other aspects of wedding planning. So, on this page you will find an explanation of Bridal Store Policies and then some rules I think are worth thinking about when you set out at the task of shopping for the most important garment of your life thus far.
Please do not be upset at my lack of political correctness on this page and others. I don't mean to pore cold water on your dreams. I only seek to give you information so you can make a better choice in a gown and avoid wasting your money on a pipe dream instead of a real dream gown that will be right for you.
Most Salons will do their best to give you a wonderful experience hoping for a good review or better - - - you recommend them to a friend. It's important to remember the old adage, “The buyer beware". We, as consumers, must look after ourselves in any retail situation. And this goes doubly when you are a bride. You are usually young and rather inexperienced with formal wear as with the other aspects of wedding planning. So, on this page you will find an explanation of Bridal Store Policies and then some rules I think are worth thinking about when you set out at the task of shopping for the most important garment of your life thus far.
Please do not be upset at my lack of political correctness on this page and others. I don't mean to pore cold water on your dreams. I only seek to give you information so you can make a better choice in a gown and avoid wasting your money on a pipe dream instead of a real dream gown that will be right for you.
Bridal Store Policies and what you need to know
#1. We Never say "No" to a Bride wanting to have alterations done in-shop.
Reason for Policy:
Many Salons want to assure a bride that no matter how busy their store gets, her needs will be taken care of.
My Objection to Policy:
This policy sounds great on the surface but could have disastrous results. During the height of bridal season (May and June) the alteration department of any salon is putting in long hours working on the meticulous needs of these special gowns. They get very stressed out. The fatigue and eye strain gets hard to deal with. Sixty to eighty hour work weeks are not uncommon. Now, any decent seamstress can do a good job hemming a simple pair of blue jeans while stressed out -BUT just think of what type of mistakes can be made when any normally skilled worker is put under such stress.
My Policy:
I take on only as much work as I can do for the hours I can be efficient in any given week. When I am booked up, I don't agree to "squeeze in" any more customers. It's just not fair for the ones already on my books. Yes, it means less money for me, but isn't it more important for the bride to have a quality, unstressed seamstress working on her precious gown? I know a few very good alteration specialist who I can recommend to these customers. I do not refer customers to any sewing specialist that I might know is in the area, if I have not ever seen any of her work.
I was told about this policy from a store I was interviewing with for the manager position for their Alteration department. It was a huge bridal and formal wear store that I thought had a good reputation so I was considering joining their team because I love working with brides and this opportunity gave me more brides to help. But sadly, they would not allow me to make referrals outside of the store even to well qualified seamstresses. Instead they wanted me, in times of over-booking, to, "just hire someone". Not only did they think it a good thing to have stressed out workers, but unskilled ones were OK too. Very scary situation that I refused to take advantage of.
Many Salons want to assure a bride that no matter how busy their store gets, her needs will be taken care of.
My Objection to Policy:
This policy sounds great on the surface but could have disastrous results. During the height of bridal season (May and June) the alteration department of any salon is putting in long hours working on the meticulous needs of these special gowns. They get very stressed out. The fatigue and eye strain gets hard to deal with. Sixty to eighty hour work weeks are not uncommon. Now, any decent seamstress can do a good job hemming a simple pair of blue jeans while stressed out -BUT just think of what type of mistakes can be made when any normally skilled worker is put under such stress.
My Policy:
I take on only as much work as I can do for the hours I can be efficient in any given week. When I am booked up, I don't agree to "squeeze in" any more customers. It's just not fair for the ones already on my books. Yes, it means less money for me, but isn't it more important for the bride to have a quality, unstressed seamstress working on her precious gown? I know a few very good alteration specialist who I can recommend to these customers. I do not refer customers to any sewing specialist that I might know is in the area, if I have not ever seen any of her work.
I was told about this policy from a store I was interviewing with for the manager position for their Alteration department. It was a huge bridal and formal wear store that I thought had a good reputation so I was considering joining their team because I love working with brides and this opportunity gave me more brides to help. But sadly, they would not allow me to make referrals outside of the store even to well qualified seamstresses. Instead they wanted me, in times of over-booking, to, "just hire someone". Not only did they think it a good thing to have stressed out workers, but unskilled ones were OK too. Very scary situation that I refused to take advantage of.
#2. We Do Not Do Refunds, All Sales Final
.webp "#2. We Do Not Do Refunds, All Sales Final")
Reason for Policy:
Weddings get canceled for many reasons. Few salons are interested in making sales that have a high risk of returning just because a fiancé got cold feet, mainly because they usually can not resell these dresses at full price.
My Objection to Policy:
There are legitimate reasons why a bridal salon should be willing to bend this policy but most will not. They might even say that they have no choice which is simply not so. They made the rule, they can break it. Even if it was found out that the sales person was dead wrong when she told you that your gown could be altered to fit, after you find out it can not, they will not refund you the money. This is just wrong.
Again, because these stores have no reason to assume you will ever return to shop there again, they have no obligation to give what other retailers would call minimal customer service. One store told me flat out in my job interview that their goal was fast customer turnaround, NOT spending inordinate amounts of time with any one customer's issue. I find this attitude distasteful. Bride's need time to make those all important decisions. A lot is at stake. Salons that do not understand the special need of brides need to get out of the business, in my opinion.
My Policy:
I don't sell dresses, so I don't have a refund policy, but I think Salons should at least be willing to refund the garment price if it is found out that alterations would not make it better, or if they just simply could not be done. If I alter a gown and the wedding gets canceled, I will work with my bride on my fee and come up with a reasonable answer for her expense with me. I have, at times, forgiven her what she owes me.
Weddings get canceled for many reasons. Few salons are interested in making sales that have a high risk of returning just because a fiancé got cold feet, mainly because they usually can not resell these dresses at full price.
My Objection to Policy:
There are legitimate reasons why a bridal salon should be willing to bend this policy but most will not. They might even say that they have no choice which is simply not so. They made the rule, they can break it. Even if it was found out that the sales person was dead wrong when she told you that your gown could be altered to fit, after you find out it can not, they will not refund you the money. This is just wrong.
Again, because these stores have no reason to assume you will ever return to shop there again, they have no obligation to give what other retailers would call minimal customer service. One store told me flat out in my job interview that their goal was fast customer turnaround, NOT spending inordinate amounts of time with any one customer's issue. I find this attitude distasteful. Bride's need time to make those all important decisions. A lot is at stake. Salons that do not understand the special need of brides need to get out of the business, in my opinion.
My Policy:
I don't sell dresses, so I don't have a refund policy, but I think Salons should at least be willing to refund the garment price if it is found out that alterations would not make it better, or if they just simply could not be done. If I alter a gown and the wedding gets canceled, I will work with my bride on my fee and come up with a reasonable answer for her expense with me. I have, at times, forgiven her what she owes me.
#3. We Maintain Uniform Alteration Procedures
Reason for Policy:
The growth in the bridal salon business has made it possible for chain stores to become fashionable. As the chain adds more stores to its family they start to think that routine alteration procedure and policy is a good thing. One store told me that they wanted every dress to have their hemming procedures the same way for uniformity in understanding between the fitter and the person doing the sewing. And so that any worker could go from one store to another and understand what is to be done for any dress they are given to work on.
My Objection to Policy:
Another Policy that sounds good on the surface. And yes, it would be convenient for a worker to move to another store in times of need and find familiar procedures - BUT, no 2 gowns are alike and no 2 brides are alike. You can't just put wedding gowns into cookie cutter categories. Whatever a gown needs to fit the individual needs of the figure of it's bride is what has to be done, whether it fits into someone's set procedure or not. Clothing alteration is just as much Art as it is Science in this respect.
My Policy:
There are some things that are common to every bridal gown, but most are not, so I do my best to stay flexible and keep an open mind about what each bride needs. For instance, there are 3 different ways I pin a hem depending on the needs of the gown - where the decoration is, if it is best for the gown that the hem to be done at the waist or the bottom, how many layers of fabric there are, etc.
I pledge to do whatever it takes to get that gown right within the capability of the gown. That means that I can only work with the variables the gown allows. If a bride bought a gown 2 sizes too small and the seams are trimmed underneath so that there is no fabric to make room for her needs, than she might end up buying another gown. Having said that, there is much that can be done to camouflage alterations like this. It takes a little creativity on the seamstress's part and a bit of understanding for the bride, but things can be done if a bride is amenable to going outside her initial vision of her perfect gown and accept some creative design changes.
The growth in the bridal salon business has made it possible for chain stores to become fashionable. As the chain adds more stores to its family they start to think that routine alteration procedure and policy is a good thing. One store told me that they wanted every dress to have their hemming procedures the same way for uniformity in understanding between the fitter and the person doing the sewing. And so that any worker could go from one store to another and understand what is to be done for any dress they are given to work on.
My Objection to Policy:
Another Policy that sounds good on the surface. And yes, it would be convenient for a worker to move to another store in times of need and find familiar procedures - BUT, no 2 gowns are alike and no 2 brides are alike. You can't just put wedding gowns into cookie cutter categories. Whatever a gown needs to fit the individual needs of the figure of it's bride is what has to be done, whether it fits into someone's set procedure or not. Clothing alteration is just as much Art as it is Science in this respect.
My Policy:
There are some things that are common to every bridal gown, but most are not, so I do my best to stay flexible and keep an open mind about what each bride needs. For instance, there are 3 different ways I pin a hem depending on the needs of the gown - where the decoration is, if it is best for the gown that the hem to be done at the waist or the bottom, how many layers of fabric there are, etc.
I pledge to do whatever it takes to get that gown right within the capability of the gown. That means that I can only work with the variables the gown allows. If a bride bought a gown 2 sizes too small and the seams are trimmed underneath so that there is no fabric to make room for her needs, than she might end up buying another gown. Having said that, there is much that can be done to camouflage alterations like this. It takes a little creativity on the seamstress's part and a bit of understanding for the bride, but things can be done if a bride is amenable to going outside her initial vision of her perfect gown and accept some creative design changes.
#4. Our Main Goal is the Selling of Dresses. We are not a Full Service Salon
This is going to sound harsh but in all too many situations it's the norm. A salesperson is motivated to sell you a dress. It's her job. She does not have to care how you look in it or if you can truly afford the price. The best bridal salespeople do care and make you feel like they are truly doing their best to help you find the gown that is right for you, not simply a gown they can sell you. But all too many just want to make sales and get on to the next customer.
Most Salespeople are paid by commission. That means the more dresses they sell the more they get paid. They don't get rated by customer satisfaction. In some bridal stores the salespeople are paid on a graduating scale. This means the pricier the gown you buy the more money your salesperson makes.
Sadly, the majority of salespersons know nothing about dress construction. But be sure that she is going to do everything in her persuasive power to convince you that the dress you like can be altered to fit you perfectly and make you look more beautiful than Cinderella. This is not just a quirk of the bridal industry. Any store you enter will have sales staff that are paid by the sales they make. It's just the way retail works. But in the bridal stores where you are not allowed the luxury of returning a gown that cannot be altered or is more expensive than you can budget for, it is very important that you make your choice carefully. Simply listening to a salesperson’s advice may cause you problems later.
I can't tell you strongly enough how heartbreaking a time you will have if your newly acquired "dream gown" ends up being a nightmare to alter - or worse, an impossible situation. Like I've said before, these stores usually have a no refund policy - AND they mean every word of it! It's your tough luck if the dress cannot be altered, even if the sale's lady said it could be. I have tried to help clients negotiate with stores for return or refund before to no avail. Their policies are strong. You need to take it upon yourself to be responsible for your choice of gown and be very sure it is right before you pay for it.
9 Rules for Successful Bridal Gown Shopping
#1. A gown that looks good in a magazine picture does not mean it will look good on you.
You probably know this, but do you really want to follow it? Falling in love with a picture in a magazine may be a big mistake. Let me try to get you to see it another way - It's not the dress that will make you beautiful on your special day. It's you. Don't fall into the trap of thinking a dress can hide any flaws in your figure. It can help a great deal, but your emphasis should not be on the dress but on the person in the dress. Look for a dress that flatters your good figure points but does not try to overpower your bad points with too much lace, frills, etc. It's so easy to buy a dress that wears you. Which would you rather hear your friends and family say, "Gee, what a gorgeous dress" or "Gee, what a beautiful Bride"?
#2. Sales people want to make sales.
This is going to sound harsh but in all too many situations it's the norm. A salesperson is motivated to sell you a dress. It's her job. She does not have to care how you look in it or if you can truly afford the price. The best bridal salespeople do care and make you feel like they are truly doing their best to help you find the gown that is right for you, not simply a gown they can sell you. But all too many just want to make sales and get on to the next customer.
Most Salespeople are paid by commission. That means the more dresses they sell the more they get paid. They don't get rated by customer satisfaction. In some bridal stores the salespeople are paid on a graduating scale. This means the pricier the gown you buy the more money your salesperson makes.
Sadly, the majority of salespersons know nothing about dress construction. But be sure that she is going to do everything in her persuasive power to convince you that the dress you like can be altered to fit you perfectly and make you look more beautiful than Cinderella. This is not just a quirk of the bridal industry. Any store you enter will have sales staff that are paid by the sales they make. It's just the way retail works. But in the bridal stores where you are not allowed the luxury of returning a gown that cannot be altered or is more expensive than you can budget for, it is very important that you make your choice carefully. Simply listening to a salesperson’s advice may cause you problems later.
I can't tell you strongly enough how heartbreaking a time you will have if your newly acquired "dream gown" ends up being a nightmare to alter - or worse, an impossible situation. Like I've said before, these stores usually have a no refund policy - AND they mean every word of it! It's your tough luck if the dress cannot be altered, even if the sale's lady said it could be. I have tried to help clients negotiate with stores for return or refund before to no avail. Their policies are strong. You need to take it upon yourself to be responsible for your choice of gown and be very sure it is right before you pay for it.
#3. If the gown is "on sale" there is probably something wrong with it.
Usually, it's that no one liked it enough to buy it, but it may also be that there is some construction flaw that is not quickly noticeable. Is it worth it to find out that the flaw you didn't notice turned up in full blazing clarity in your wedding pictures? Just remember that because it's "on sale" does not mean it's a bargain.
#4. Never buy a dress that is over one size too small and avoid buying a dress that is over one size too big.
Salespeople will tell you that any dress can be altered. As you stand there in a dress that cannot be zipped up the back because it is 6" too small a salesperson will assure you that pieces can be taken off the bottom to be put in the seams to make the dress fit. Though this is usually true that same salesperson will not tell you that it will also either look very odd or simply awful after the alteration is made - AND it will cost you lots of money to have done. I have done this alteration procedure several times, mostly on gowns that belonged to the bride's mother and passed down for the daughter to wear. In this case you do some odd things to get the gown to fit. But I don't recommend doing these types of things on a new gown. It's not usually good for the structural integrity of the gown and it's better on your nerves to simply pick another gown. AND anything that makes it easier on a bride’s nerves; I am all for.
The perfect fitting wedding gown is a very rare thing. In my 40 plus years of working on bridal garments I have seen only a hand full of gowns that needed nothing adjusted, not even a hem. The trick to getting a great fitting gown does start with the best fit you can get off the rack or ordered carefully. And the rule of thumb is, "It is easier to take something in than it is to let out". And quite often it is impossible to let something out. It depends on how much fabric is in the seam allowance and if it has been clipped to smooth out curves or not. That's when adding pieces becomes necessary.
The final decisions are always up to you BUT let me give you my best advice. Do not let yourself be talked into buying a dress that needs more alterations than you feel comfortable with or that your budget can handle. It's best for the structural integrity of the gown and your nerves to have the least amount of altering as possible - AND that's coming from someone who makes a living altering.
#4a Do not diet to make yourself smaller than the gown you just ordered.
This is an extension of rule #4. If you diet and make your body over 2 sizes smaller than the gown you ordered, alterations will be costly to make the gown fit your smaller body and you may lose design elements of the gown that you won't like losing.
I fail to understand why any bride HAS TO diet in the first place. Your groom fell in love with you the way you are. If you think you must change yourself for the wedding day, then you need to re-evaluate the reasons you are getting married. AND if you are feeling the need to send me an angry email scolding me for this opinion then you are only proving my point correct. If you think you must have a perfect body for your perfect wedding day then you are in for a very sad married life. Nothing in this human experience is perfect. Neither are you or your groom. You must be yourself! It’s very important to present the person you are to your future spouse for the wedding ceremony. If you can't be who you are, are you going to turn into someone else just because you're getting married?
I get emails from brides almost daily, asking how to plan for their dieting in ordering/buying their wedding gowns. My answer is always - Don't diet! If you have been dieting before you shop for your gown it is best that you stop once the gown is ordered and go on a maintenance plan to keep your body shape the same as it was measured for the size of the gown. This will save you costly alterations and the great stress of dieting while dealing with the multitude of things that must be dealt with in planning a wedding. This is supposed to be a happy time. Adding the stress of dieting does not make sense to me. If you can't make your way through this time with joy, then your marriage is in danger from the start.
I have a rule that brides who are dieting must stop once they have their first fitting with me. If they refuse, then I do not agree to make their gown alterations. I do not want the stress of doing the alterations twice should the bride's body shrink more than I have pinned the gown in the first place, and what customer wants to pay twice? It is not right for the other brides I want to do good work for, to have one bride stressing me more than necessary. I do not keep Bridezillas in my service. If you are overly stressing me then you can find another alteration lady to bother. I want to do my best work for each bride in my service unstressed by one bad attitude bride who is not ready for marriage.
Now, all that said - it is a good thing for a female to care enough about herself to want to improve her body and become a healthier person. Dieting may be part of this, but it is not a good idea to do it while planning a wedding. If you are doing this for the good reason of your own self-esteem, do it before or after the wedding.
#5. Just because a bridal consultant takes your measurements does not mean the dress is being made to those exact measurements.
If you are not buying a gown off the rack your sales associate will measure you to determine what size you need to order. This does not mean the dress is going to be sewn to your exact measurements. Many a bride has been surprised and even dismayed to find that her newly arrived gown does not fit her perfectly. "But they took my measurements?" is usually a common reply.
You need to understand the difference between "Special Order " and "Custom Made". In Custom Made, a garment is cut and sewn to a specific set of client measurements and should fit well when finished. In contrast, a Special-Order garment is chosen carefully using size charts to determine the best size to order that will make alterations minimal, but it usually does not eliminate the need for them. Few retail bridal salons can offer Custom Made gowns. It is a very expensive undertaking that few customers can handle. Special Ordering is sometimes tricky because the various companies have varying sizing charts and when you add the fact that no two brides have exactly the same body, you can start to understand why alterations are a necessary part of the gown selection process.
When your sales associate selects a size for your gown, she is looking at many factors. One of the most important is your figure proportions. Since it is always better to take a large area in, then let a small one out. Your associate is going to select a size determined by your largest proportion for the size category you best fit into. This means that if you have a large bustline in proportion to your waist and hips, she will select the size to best fit your bust and you will need alterations in the waist and hip areas to make them fit to your measurements. In contrast, a small-busted bride will have to select a size according to her hip measurement. Alterations may be needed in the bust area, or as many brides choose, padding can be cleverly added to enhance the figure to fit the gown.
Salespeople will tell you that any dress can be altered. As you stand there in a dress that cannot be zipped up the back because it is 6" too small a salesperson will assure you that pieces can be taken off the bottom to be put in the seams to make the dress fit. Though this is usually true that same salesperson will not tell you that it will also either look very odd or simply awful after the alteration is made - AND it will cost you lots of money to have done. I have done this alteration procedure several times, mostly on gowns that belonged to the bride's mother and passed down for the daughter to wear. In this case you do some odd things to get the gown to fit. But I don't recommend doing these types of things on a new gown. It's not usually good for the structural integrity of the gown and it's better on your nerves to simply pick another gown. AND anything that makes it easier on a bride’s nerves; I am all for.
The perfect fitting wedding gown is a very rare thing. In my 40 plus years of working on bridal garments I have seen only a hand full of gowns that needed nothing adjusted, not even a hem. The trick to getting a great fitting gown does start with the best fit you can get off the rack or ordered carefully. And the rule of thumb is, "It is easier to take something in than it is to let out". And quite often it is impossible to let something out. It depends on how much fabric is in the seam allowance and if it has been clipped to smooth out curves or not. That's when adding pieces becomes necessary.
The final decisions are always up to you BUT let me give you my best advice. Do not let yourself be talked into buying a dress that needs more alterations than you feel comfortable with or that your budget can handle. It's best for the structural integrity of the gown and your nerves to have the least amount of altering as possible - AND that's coming from someone who makes a living altering.
#6 Doublecheck Everything.
Whether buying a gown off the rack or ordering one, examine it VERY carefully before paying for it or accepting delivery and taking it out of the store. If you find a flaw after you get the gown home, the store is under no obligation to fix it. They do not have to give you any compensation either. "All sales are final" is very true in the bridal industry.
a) Check for fit - If you have ordered this gown with measurements taken by the store attendant, the fit should be close to good. It is not usually perfect. Though they took your measurements, the gown was not custom made to them. The measurements were taken to compare them to a chart of sizes for the gown. The store associate picks a size that will give the closest fit for you, but alterations are usually necessary to fine tune the fit.
For some figure types there may need to be extensive alteration. This happens when one measurement is very large or small in comparison to the others. The gown's size is selected by the largest body measurement. If a lady has a hip measurement of 42" and a bust of 34", the dress will be ordered by the hip measurement, and the bust area will need tightening.
b) Check for flaws - If you wait to examine the gown when you get home and find a tear in the fabric that happened in the shipping process, it is your problem to fix. The store does not have to help you. Some will, but most will not. They have your money and don't have to do anything for you. I don't mean to sound cynical, but I do want to forewarn you. The system is harsh, but it can be worked with if you take the precautions to educate yourself and be prepared when difficulties arise.
c) Check for alteration elements - If you are buying a gown off the rack that is a little too tight, and you have no choice to get a larger size, check the seams for let-out space. If the seams are trimmed close or clipped for better shaping around curves, then it cannot be let out. It is better that you find another gown than go through the heartache of finding out that the one you bought and cannot return is not able to be altered.
If the gown will need taking in check the sides seams for design elements that may be lost. Most designers will position lace and beading away from alteration points like side seams, but often these get taken in the seams when they are sewn. Some laces can be removed before the seams are taken in and replaced over the alteration, but this too has its drawbacks. Beads may fall off in the moving process and create a costly situation to replace. You can examine the gown carefully to see if the beads were sewn to the lace first, then the lace to the gown. In this case the beads will not fall off, and the lace can be more easily replaced after the alteration.
Taking along a trusted friend or family member who sews is helpful. But understand that wedding gowns have special fabrics and construction that she may not be familiar with.
#7 Buy the gown you want.
This may seem silly, but many brides buy a gown that is "close" to what they want thinking they can alter it. I have stated many times on this site that altering for fit is one thing but altering for design change is another. Do not be tempted to buy a gown that is marked way down just because a salesperson says it can be changed into the gown of your dreams. Remember, that sweet teenager helping you knows nothing about alterations and less about design changing.
Visit the Impossible page for more info on changing design elements.
#8 If you are a C cup or higher - You Will Need a Bra.
If you are large busted and need support, you will need to shop for a gown style that lets you wear a bra that will support you. The gown cannot give you this support even if it is boned. Gowns are designed to support themselves, not your breasts. Many small breasted brides can go braless in many gown styles, but anyone larger than a B may find that this is not the case for her.
Proper support is so very important not only to how you look but how you feel that day. If you feel lousy, you will look lousy. I advise that you buy a good supportive bra first and then go looking for a gown style that has a neckline that will cover the bra back and front. Do not let yourself fall in love with a gown that has a lacy, or revealing neckline before you have selected your bra.
Proper support is so very important not only to how you look but how you feel that day. If you feel lousy, you will look lousy. I advise that you buy a good supportive bra first and then go looking for a gown style that has a neckline that will cover the bra back and front. Do not let yourself fall in love with a gown that has a lacy, or revealing neckline before you have selected your bra.
#9 Saying, "Yes" to the Dress
You have found the 1! or have you??? Some important things to consider and weigh before you say, "Yes".
#1. Can I stand comfortably for my pictures?
Pictures are very important to how you choose the dress. They are your memories that will last long past the time you will forget how uncomfortable you were wearing that gown for all those hours. Standing still in a dress is very different than moving in it. Dancing, hugging, sitting, walking - all these things you will do, and the dress must do them with you. At times you may not be as comfortable as you would like, but you have to weigh that with your desire for the look you want.
I put a lot of value on comfort when it comes to wedding gowns. If you don't feel good, then how can you look good? I often advise ladies to let me make the dress a little less tight to add comfort. They always want a tiny waistline, but the risk of popping seams is not worth it. But this must be weighed with your options for altering things you don't like about the design or fit. You may have to accept a degree of discomfort for the sake of the look you want or the inability of the dress to be changed.
#2. Am I going to be dancing, eating, etc.?
The activities you plan for the reception may change the way you alter the dress. If you are not dancing, you may opt for a tighter fit because you don't need to move so freely. Hugging is a big activity you will want to be able to do, so arm freedom is a biggie. Many design elements in gowns today restrict arm movement- A wide neckline is one. Giving someone a nice view when you only meant to show familiar affection may not be your idea of a good thing. Then again, many brides do obsess about this. A wide neckline does not equate with guests staring at your cleavage. You must force yourself to see it as they do. You looking down at your neckline, are getting a much different view than someone standing in front of you is getting. Put your dress on a dress form and stand back to look. You will be amazed at the difference you see.
#3. What is my budget?
Design choice may need to be weighed by the added expense - that could be a lot - with the other things you could use this money for. Sure, the wedding gown is the most important item to spend money on in making your wedding plans. When the gown is right everything else just seems to fall into place. But there is a point when you must ask yourself if you aren't going overboard about it. Only you can answer that. You may need to choose if it is more important to you to have your guests eating delicious food or complimenting you on your gown.
#4. Don't let anyone rush you.
Rushing your decisions is a big taboo. After all I say about moderation and honestly asking yourself if you might be making a bigger thing out of this than it is, I do still hold that the decisions you make concerning your special wedding gown are the most important. Don't let anyone rush you.
Our Visitors' Questions
If you have an issue with your bridal salon you need to be talking to them about it. Many a bride has no idea what the procedures are in these stores and miscommunications happens all the time. If you feel it helps to write to an impartial third party just to get your feelings out, I will listen and reply as best I can. I can't always solve these types of problems but I can help you see why things are the way they are and maybe give you ideas for adjusting the situations to be more in line with your original dreams.
Many Store issues revolve around their return Policy. It is a general rule that bridal garments are never returnable. It will state this somewhere on your contract of receipt. It's a very hard policy to understand for many young ladies who are used to returning clothing items. This is a very important policy for the Salons. They probably could not stay in business without it. Weddings are called off every day for all kinds of reasons. It's just not the store's fault. They can't resell a gown for full price. so this policy is necessary - BUT many stores apply it to situations where they shouldn't. It's my opinion that if a sales person gives a bride poor advice and the gown comes in totally unusable, the store should step in and make it right.
Aside from what I wrote above this section, many of my answers to these questions are in defense or support of the Bridal Shop.
Many Store issues revolve around their return Policy. It is a general rule that bridal garments are never returnable. It will state this somewhere on your contract of receipt. It's a very hard policy to understand for many young ladies who are used to returning clothing items. This is a very important policy for the Salons. They probably could not stay in business without it. Weddings are called off every day for all kinds of reasons. It's just not the store's fault. They can't resell a gown for full price. so this policy is necessary - BUT many stores apply it to situations where they shouldn't. It's my opinion that if a sales person gives a bride poor advice and the gown comes in totally unusable, the store should step in and make it right.
Aside from what I wrote above this section, many of my answers to these questions are in defense or support of the Bridal Shop.
